My Blessing Can Kick Your Blessing's Ass

Brother Dawson Joshua Michael Busenbark, through the authority of the Holy Priesthood and as an ordained Patriarch, I lay my hands upon your head to reveal to you your Patriarchal Blessing and such instructions and promises that the spirit of the Lord may direct. You come to the Lord with a yearning in your heart to know His mind and will. You can be assured, Dawson, that He is pleased with this evidence of your faith, and He looks forward to the future with anticipation of your enthusiasm for the development of your faith, your hope , and your courage in following the pathway of life. You are one of Heavenly Father's special spirit children. Because of your exceedingly great faith and good works in your premortal life, you became one of His chosen. You were foreordained to be a leader among men. You will bring many of the living and the dead into the Church and Kingdom of God. you were also foreordained to be born through a special lineage and through special parents. You are of the House of Israel, having been born through the lineage of Ephraim, the royal tribe commissioned to be a light unto the world. As an heir of Ephraim, through your faithfulness, you are entitled to all of the blessings of the gospel, the blessings of the priesthood, and the blessings of eternal life. It is the Lord's will that you be diligent in keeping His commandments and that you adhere strictly to the words of the Prophets as they have explained the way one should live to achieve eternal life.

You have been down into the waters of baptism and have received a remission of your sins through repentance. I bless you that you will be mindful of the covenant which is implied in this baptism, that you will always remember him and that you will keep his commandments, and he will remember the promises that he made to you that he will forgive you for those things which you might have done in moments of weakness that were not pleasing in his sight. He promised that your sins and transgressions would be blotted out of the book of remembrance. As you repent and are faithful before the Lord, you will be worthy to seek him in humble prayer, and he will lend a listening ear. I pray that you will ask only for those things necessary to your salvation. I bless you that you will be patient for his time is different from that of his children. He will, in his own due time, and in his own due way, answer your prayers and grant you the righteous desires of your heart, and in addition, will bless you with all the blessings that you stand in need of to accomplish your mission here on earth.

With the blessings that you were promised through your chosen lineage, you also accepted responsibilities to your fellowmen. The Plan of Salvation is for all mankind, and you covenanted with Heavenly Father that you would be of service to him in helping to establish righteousness in the earth. You will have many opportunities to exercise your priesthood in behalf of others as you share the gospel with them. Prepare yourself well in understanding the principles of the gospel, for one day you will be called to serve as a missionary in an area of the world where the Lord can best utilize your talents and abilities. There are many in the world today who are waiting to hear the message of the gospel which they once heard in the spirit world but forgot at birth. When they hear it again, they will feel that it is something they have believed all their lives, and they will bless you for bringing it again to their remembrance. Your years spent in the service of the Lord as a missionary will be some of the most memorable of your life.

At an important time in your life, you will have the opportunity to take a choice daughter of Zion to the Lord's holy house to be sealed for time and all eternity in the new and everlasting covenant of marriage. Keep yourself worthy for a temple marriage, for it is essential that you receive the sacred temple ordinances in order to one day be exalted in Heavenly Father's kingdom. Through your union of marriage, choice spirits will grace your home, and they will be a joy and blessing to you and your companion. I bless you that as patriarch of your family, you will preside with patience, with love, with kindness, and with understanding. Remember how important it is to show by example and precept importance of the gospel in your life. Teach your children righteous living, and you will have the pleasure of seeing them grow to be worthy servants of the Lord. I bless you that you will be kind and considerate to your companion, and she will reciprocate with love and will support you in all your righteous endeavors. She will make your home a heaven on earth, where all who enter will find it a haven of peace. I bless you that you will be mindful of the responsibility you have to your kindred dead. To redeem them, you must first find out who they are, and after you obtain the information you need, you should see that the important work is done for them which they cannot do for themselves. The day you pass through the veil into your next estate will be one of joy and happiness, for they will greet you with open arms and declare you their savior on Mt. Zion.

I bless you that you will be able to withstand the difficulties and the adversities that you will face in life. There will be sorrows and hard times, but these are things for your experience. With the Lord's help, you may turn every obstacle in life's pathway into a blessing. Remember that the trials you are called upon to face in life are but for a moment in God's eternal plan. I bless you that you will see beyond the present, and that you will experience great joy and peace of mind as you contemplate the eternal blessings that are promised to the faithful. I bless you that you will study the scriptures, for in them you will find truths that are eternal, and they will help you overcome the daily problems of life. I bless you that you will make temple attendance an important part of your life, for in the temple you become close to the Lord for there the veil is thin. There you may receive answers to your prayers and instructions that will prepare you for eternal life. Stay close to your parents for they love you very much and are very desirous that you be a part of their eternal family.

Evil is rampant in the world today, but Satan and his followers can have no influence over you unless you allow it. Through the power of the priesthood, you are more powerful than he. I bless you that you will never be tempted by the powers of evil greater than that which you can withstand. You are blessed with the gift of faith, and through this great gift, miraculous things will occur in your life. You will receive personal revelation as to the mysteries of the Kingdom of Heaven. Ask the Lord in faith, and He will hear and answer your prayers. Pay your tithes and offerings,and give of your time, talents and means in supporting the work of the Lord and He will open the windows of Heaven to you.

I bless you that you will live until you are satisfied with days, and on the morning of the first resurrection, you will come forth clothed in a celestial body, beautiful and radiant, to reign as a king in your own household and dominion which will increase endlessly. This blessing I seal upon you, conditioned upon your faithfulness, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Paul C. Singleton, Patriarch
Orem Utah Aspen Stake
Patriarchal Blessing Number 206

My Mormon Fortune Telling

Sister Crystal Ann Busenbark, by the authority given me as an ordained patriarch in the Orem Suncrest Stake of Zion, I give you a special blessing.

You are already blessed to have received the Gospel, to have been baptized and make the covenants of baptism that you will always remember our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ , and that you will attempt to keep yourself worthy, free from sin, that you will repent of the errors that you make so that you may hold fast to the guidance of the Plan of Salvation and stand spotless before the Lord.

I bless you with health and strength of mind and body. You realize Crystal, that your body is in your own care now that you have decided to leave your parents home. Planning meals, cleaning and sanitizing the home, and all other practical worldly chores are now your responsibility. These things affect how you live, how healthy you become or stay and how well you protect this body as the tabernacle of your spirit.

I bless you that you will enjoy the beauties of the world around you, and that you will share and create for your family, particularly your husband, art, music, and any other efforts to show the greatness of God's creations.

I bless that you will be protected from violence of any kind, that you will be able to communicate with your husband and children your desires, your wishes, and the principles that you know are true by which all of us should be worthy of. That you will live, and endure to the end.

Crystal, you, like your husband, are from the lineage of Ephraim. Together with your husband study this great heritage. Promises made to Abraham come to you through this lineage and through your husbands priesthood. They are promises that will be yours as long as you merit them, as long as you are worthy of them. Live so that you will merit them and so that you can pass them on to your own descendants.

Crystal, the world is full of evil things. Many of these things are associated with our public media and they are not worthy of any of us, and they offer great temptations which can be very alluring. I bless you that you will be protected from them through your prayers, through your faith, and through the support of your husband and his priesthood.

I bless you that the pursuit which you are following of your own ancestors will be successful so that you may offer them and others whom you may choose to serve vicariously the blessing of baptism into the one true church so that they may have the worldly ordinances completed and accept them on the other side of the veil.

You are very young and life has been short. I bless you that it will be long in mortal terms, though at best it is short in eternal terms. I bless you that when the times comes you will be worthy to go to the temple and seal your marriage into an eternal contract in which you will look to your husband and your husband will look to the lord, and the promises made to those who are worthy to be sealed, may be yours through your worthiness so that at the end of this mortal probation you will be able to return to the presence of your Father in Heaven, and he will say to you, "Well done my good and faithful daughter. Enter into my rest, into my Celestial Kingdom on the morning of the first resurrection". These blessings , with those unspoken that you faithfully desire and seek, I bless you with in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Dean Burton Farnsworth , Patriarch
Orem Suncrest Stake
January 2nd, 2000
Patriarchal Blessing Number 494
Oh, and to complete the blasphemy also, my temple name is Ruth... Hi Japheth!

crystal ball

As part of my rejection of Mormon taboos about revealing "holy" things, I've decided to post the full text of my Patriarchal Blessing - the Mormon version of a fortune telling.

Note that the ridiculous punctuation, spelling and capitalisation are not mine, but that of the patriarch and/or his secretary.

Jonathon Craig Fitzner, in my sacred calling as Patriarch to the Madison Wisconsin Stake of Zion, I place my hands upon your head and confer upon you, your Patriarchal Blessing, a special communication to you from the Lord, by way of His Holy Spirit; and He is pleased that you want to be here to have this experience and will grant your every righteous desire. You have been blessed with many blessings already in your life, having been raised in a home where the principles of the everlasting gospel are observed and taught. You have been given this blessing because of your integrity, your righteous desires and your willingness to follow the counsel that was give you, when you dwelt in the realm of your heavenly parents.

You are of Israel and of Ephraim, son of righteous Joseph, who was sold into Egypt by his brothers; and it is through the tribe of Ephraim that the Lord is performing His work in the gathering together of His people on this earth, for the last time; and you are very blessed to be on hand to be a part of that great work.

You have many opportunities to serve the Lord in the building up of His kingdom , in the three-fold program of the Church; and will be able to serve your brothers and sisters in whatever ward you may reside, in the various callings, including those of leadership; and also you will be blessed to ave opportunities to share the gospel, not only as a member of the Church, who's responsibility it is to do so, but as a missionary, called and commissioned of God and sent somewhere in the world to seek out the honest in heart and bring them into the fold of Christ.

The Lord wants you to know that you are special and that you were sent to this earth to accomplish certain things,which you will come to know and understand, as you continue faithful and stay close to Him and let Him lead you by the hand.

A prophet of God as told us that one of our greatest individual responsibilities is in the seeking of the records of our kindred dead, for there are many of them waiting on the other side of the veil, who have a desire for their vicarious work to be done and are looking to you and your family to be saviors on Mt. Zion, for them. These are people whom you love, but whom you have never met; and they are important to you and you are important to them. I bless you that will have that burning in your hear and the strength to go forward and do the things that they need done, things that they cannot do for themselves.

I counsel you to study the Holy Scriptures, for in them is contained the fulness of the everlasting gospel, and also a knowledge of the mysteries, which can be unfolded unto you, if you pray and ask the Lord for understanding and allow Him to pour knowledge upon you, which will give you the things you need to succeed in all your righteous endeavors; and also will bring happiness and joy to your soul.

I further counsel you to pray to the Lord always and ask for strength to overcome your weaknesses and warn you that adversary knows both your strengths and your weaknesses and will try to put roadblocks in your way to prevent you from being successful on the Lord's errand; and I further remind you that you have power over him, through the gift that you were given, ant the time of your baptism; and that power will increase, as you progress and receive the Melchizedek Priesthood and magnify your calling.

I bless you that you will have the opportunity to receive all of the blessings and benefits of the Holy Temple, from the reception of your own endowments, to marriage for time and for all eternity; and the great privilege of watching your own descendants continue the work of service to the Lord, not only now, but forever.

I remind you that all promises and blessings that the Lord offers to us are predicated upon righteous and worthy living; and that these promises and blessings are also of an eternal nature and will eventually come to pass , if we are true and faithful to our covenants.

I bless that you will have the Lord's help in the pursuit of your education, in finding an eternal companion; and also in being successful in your life's work, so that you will always have the means to carry out every good and righteous thing you desire to do.

I bless that the day will come when you can stand before God with confidence in knowing you have done your best to serve Him; and have the Savior by your side to plead for you to the Father, and hear the Father welcome you into His kingdom, to be there with all those who have sacrificed everything for eternal life, which is the greatest of all the gifts of God.

Remember that everything you have done in the past, whether good or bad, whether large or small, is not as important as the things you do from now on, for if you have done bad things, they can be erased and if you have done good things, you cannot rest on your laurels, but must continue to serve the Lord, throughout your life; and if you do this, with all your might, the Lord can mold you to be one of His righteous and noble servants, which is what He sent you to this earth to be.

Remember that it is important that you have love in your heart for everyone, especially those whom you serve and those whom you teach, for with out that love, the Holy Spirit cannot do its work; and with that love, you can accomplish things beyond your greatest imagination.

I counsel you to follow the Prophet and the other leaders of the Church, stay close to your bishop or branch president in whatever ward or branch you may reside, do your best and eternity is yours; and this is your Patriarchal Blessing, which I seal upon you by the authority of the Holy Melchizedek Priesthood, in the name of Jesus Christ, our Redeemer, amen.

12 August 2001
Madison Wisconsin Stake
Harold J. Hovorka
Patriarchal Blessing Number 135

Oh, and just to complete the blasphemy, my temple name is Japheth.

Licked Cupcakes and Wilted Roses

It was a beautiful and sunny afternoon as I found myself sitting in the last place on earth that I wanted to be at that moment, a hard metal folding chair in the young women's room. The room was filled with bustling young women chattering like chipmunks in their separate clicks. Sarah was talking about the phone sex she and a boy from Payson were having, Jenny was going on about the mean teacher she had for Spanish that year and Candice was putting on makeup while talking about the new spring line that Pac Sun had just put out. I was sitting quietly in the back of the room, leaning the chair back so the front legs were off the ground and the wall was supporting me. My eyes were closed, I was thinking; thinking about how dumb I was for not skipping Beehives and walking down to the lake to finish my hundredth reading of A Mid Summer Nights Dream instead.

“Okay girls, everybody settle down”, said Sister Johnson as she came in the room. I rested my chair back upon the ground and forced myself away from the day dreams playing out in my head. “Today girls, we’re going to be learning about chastity and how as daughters of our Heavenly Father it is our greatest responsibility to protect our virtue at all costs.” Wonderful I thought, yet another lesson on the importance of innocence and purity. “Okay girls, I’ve made us all a special treat today… cupcakes!” Oh wow, now I was really excited. Sister Johnson pulled out a tray filled with bright pink cupcakes topped with rainbow sprinkles. Next she did something so absurd that I remember thinking that she might have just lost her ever living mind, she grabbed a cupcake off the tray and proceeded to lick all over it with her fat pink tongue. As if nothing out of the ordinary had just occurred she placed the cupcake back on the tray and began passing it around the room, instructing us to each take one. Everyone stayed clear of the tainted cupcake eying it with utter distaste. When the tray finally reached me at the far end of the room I remember thinking, “Of course, I just had to be the one to get the crazy ladies cupcake”.

Being as polite as I could I picked the tray up and brought it back to the front of the class as dozens of eyes bore into me. I set the tray down on the table and turned to walk back to my chair, “Well where are you going Crystal, you didn’t take your cupcake” Sister Johnson said in a sickly sweet voice. “No thank you”, I replied.“Well why not, I made these cupcakes because I really care about all you girls and I really want you to have one”. She picked the dirty cupcake up and shoved it into my hands. “Why don’t you take a bite, they’re delicious” Sister Johnson urged. Quickly losing my patience in whatever game we were playing I replied, “Listen, I don’t know why you licked all over this cupcake and I don’t know why you’re trying so desperately to get me to eat it but I’m not doing it”. I gently placed the cupcake back on the tray. A huge smile broke across Sister Johnson's faced as she lifted the diseased cupcake into the air,” See girls, people don’t want things that have been contaminated” As I looked around the room I saw a rainbow of emotions playing out on the faces of these young girls. Some were giggling, some whispering to their neighbor and then there were the ones with their heads held down in shame.

The licked cupcake is a very popular lesson in chastity that is taught to virtually every young woman in the church. If it’s not a cupcake then its white roses that are handed out to the girls with the last girl receiving a wilted, stomped on, and de-petaled flower. In this object lesson the cupcakes and roses represent us, the females of the church and we learned very quickly that we didn’t want to be a licked cupcake or a wilted rose because no one wants a disgusting and ugly object such as that, those items are destined for the garbage can. In young men’s the cupcakes also represented the girls. The boys are taught that no one wants a licked cupcake and neither should they. I was never told that boys could also be licked cupcakes, what the boys did was none of our business. Every single girl in the room that day knew that we were never to let a boy touch us, or no one would ever want us. The burden of chastity was ours to bear, and the prospects of forgiveness for failure were grim.

Steps In Overcoming Masturbation

Mark E. Petersen
Council of the 12 apostles
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints

Be assured that you can be cured of your difficulty. Many have been, both male and female, and you can be also if you determine that it must be so.

This determination is the first step. That is where we begin. You must decide that you will end this practice, and when you make that decision, the problem will be greatly reduced at once.

But it must be more than a hope or a wish, more than knowing that it is good for you. It must be actually a decision. If you truly make up your mind that you will be cured, then you will have the strength to resist any tendencies which you may have and any temptations which may come to you. After you have made this decision, then observe the following specific guidelines.

A Guide to Self-Control

1. Never touch the intimate parts of your body except during normal toilet processes. Avoid being alone as much as possible. Find good company and stay in this good company.

2. If you are associated with other persons having this same problem, you must break off their friendship. Never associate with other people having the same weakness. Don't suppose that two of you will quit together, you never will. You must get away from people of that kind. Just to be in their presence will keep your problem foremost in your mind. The problem must be taken out of your mind for that is where it really exists. Your mind must be on other and more wholesome things.

3. When you bathe, do not admire yourself in a mirror. Never stay in the bath more than five or six minutes -- just long enough to bathe and dry and dress and then get out of the bathroom into a room where you will have some member of your family present.

4. When in bed, if that is where you have your problem for the most part, dress yourself for the night so securely that you cannot easily touch your vital parts, and so that it would be difficult and time consuming for you to remove those clothes. By the time you started to remove protective clothing you would have sufficiently controlled your thinking that the temptation would leave you.

5. If the temptation seems overpowering while you are in bed, get out of bed and go into the kitchen and fix yourself a snack, even if it is in the middle of the night, and even if you are not hungry, and despite your fears of gaining weight. The purpose behind this suggestion is that you get your mind on something else. You are the subject of your thoughts, so to speak.

6. Never read pornographic material. Never read about your problem. Keep it out of mind. Remember -- "First a thought, then an act." The thought pattern must be changed. You must not allow this problem to remain in your mind. When you accomplish that, you soon will be free of the act.

7. Put wholesome thoughts into your mind at all times. Read good books -- Church books -- Scriptures -- Sermons of the Brethren. Make a daily habit of reading at least one chapter of Scripture, preferably from one of the four Gospels in the New Testament, or the Book of Mormon. The four Gospels -- Matthew, Mark, Luke and John -- above anything else in the Bible can be helpful because of their uplifting qualities.

8. Pray. But when you pray, don't pray about this problem, for that will tend to keep it in your mind more than ever. Pray for faith, pray for understanding of the Scriptures, pray for the Missionaries, the General Authorities, your friends, your families, but keep the problem out of your mind by not mentioning it ever -- not in conversation with others, not in your prayers. keep it out of your mind!

The attitude of a person toward his problem has an effect on how easy it is to overcome. It is essential that a firm commitment be made to control the habit. As a person understands his reasons for the behavior, and is sensitive to the conditions or situations that may trigger a desire for the act, he develops the power to control it.

We are taught that our bodies are temples of God, and are to be clean so that the Holy Ghost may dwell within us. Masturbation is a sinful habit that robs one of the Spirit and creates guilt and emotional stress. It is not physically harmful unless practiced in the extreme. It is a habit that is totally self-centered, and secretive, and in no way expresses the proper use of the procreative power given to man to fulfill eternal purposes. It therefore separates a person from God and defeats the gospel plan.

This self-gratifying activity will cause one to lose his self-respect and feel guilty and depressed, which can in the extreme lead to further sinning. As a person feels spiritually unclean, he loses his interest in prayer, his testimony becomes weak, and missionary work and other Church callings become burdensome, offering no joy and limited success.

As one meets with his Priesthood Leader, a program for overcoming masturbation can be implemented using some of the suggestions which follow. Remember it is essential that a regular report program be agreed on, so progress can be recognized and failures understood and eliminated.

Suggestions

1. Pray daily, ask for the gifts of the Spirit, that which will strengthen you against temptation. Pray fervently and out lout when the temptations are the strongest.

2. Follow a program of vigorous daily exercise. The exercises reduce emotional tension and depression and are absolutely basic to the solution of this problem. Double your physical activity when you feel stress increasing.

3. When the temptation to masturbate is strong, yell STOP to those thoughts as loudly as you can in your mind and then recite a pre-chosen Scripture or sing an inspirational hymn. It is important to turn your thoughts away from the selfish need to indulge.

4. Set goals of abstinence, begin with a day, then a week, month, year and finally commit to never doing it again. Until you commit yourself to _never again_ you will always be open to temptation.

5. Change in behavior and attitude is most easily achieved through a changed self-image. Spend time every day imagining yourself strong and in control, easily overcoming tempting situations.

6. Begin to work daily on a self-improvement program. Relate this plan to improving your Church service, to improving your relationships with your family, God and others. Strive to enhance your strengths and talents.

7. Be outgoing and friendly. Force yourself to be with others and learn to enjoy working and talking to them. Use principles of developing friendships found in books such as How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie.

8. Be aware of situations that depress you or that cause you to feel lonely, bored, frustrated or discouraged. These emotional states can trigger the desire to masturbate as a way of escape. Plan in advance to counter these low periods through various activities, such as reading a book, visiting a friend, doing something athletic, etc.

9. Make a pocket calendar for a month on a small card. Carry it with you, but show it to no one. If you have a lapse of self control, color the day black. Your goal will be to have no black days. The calendar becomes a strong visual reminder of self control and should be looked at when you are tempted to add another black day. Keep your calendar up until you have at least three clear months.

10. A careful study will indicate you have had the problem at certain times and under certain conditions. Try and recall, in detail, what your particular times and conditions were. Now that you understand how it happens, plan to break the pattern through counter activities.

11. In the field of psychotherapy there is a very effective technique called aversion therapy. When we associate or think of something very distasteful with something which has been pleasurable, but undesirable, the distasteful thought and feeling will begin to cancel out that which was pleasurable. If you associate something very distasteful with your loss of self-control it will help you to stop the act. For example, if you are tempted to masturbate, think of having to bathe in a tub of worms, and eating several of them as you do the act.

12. During your toileting and shower activities leave the bathroom door or shower curtain partly open, to discourage being alone in total privacy. Take cool brief showers.

13. Arise immediately in the mornings. Do not lie in bed awake, no matter what time of day it is. Get up and do something. Start each day with an enthusiastic activity.

14. Keep your bladder empty. Refrain from drinking large amounts of fluids before retiring.

15. Reduce the amount of spices and condiments in your food. Eat as lightly as possible at night.

16. Wear pajamas that are difficult to open, yet loose and not binding.

17. Avoid people, situations, pictures or reading materials that might create sexual excitement.
18. It is sometimes helpful to have a physical object to use in overcoming this problem. A Book of Mormon, firmly held in hand, even in bed at night has proven helpful in extreme cases.

19. In very severe cases it may be necessary to tie a hand to the bed frame with a tie in order that the habit of masturbating in a semi-sleep condition can be broken. This can also be accomplished by wearing several layers of clothing which would be difficult to remove while half asleep.

20. Set up a reward system for your successes. It does not have to be a big reward. A quarter in a receptacle each time you overcome or reach a goal. Spend it on something which delights you and will be a continuing reminder of your progress.

21. Do not let yourself return to any past habit or attitude patterns which were part of your problem. Satan never gives up. Be calmly and confidently on guard. Keep a positive mental attitude. You can win this fight! The joy and strength you will feel when you do will give your whole life a radiant and spiritual glow of satisfaction and fulfillment.

to think, or to obey, that is the question

The LdS church-run Brigham Young University (the BYU) tends to be a fascinating microcosm of Mormon culture and ideas. Because it is not very prone to outside influences or pressure, it is inclined to intensify and more explicitly state those ideas to a degree that is greater than one might find in Mormon populations elsewhere (especially outside of Utah).

In my time at BYU as a student, I observed how the attitudes and ideas that growing up had previously been restricted to the home and the church were also very visible outside of those two areas, and in society at large. This being because the vast, vast majority of people (over 90%) were not only Mormon, but were also from a shared ethnic and often common socio-economic background. This transferred into an incredibly homogeneous culture that I found to be very uncomfortable and often disconcerting; where the authoritarian aspects of Mormonism fed off themselves and became an all-pervasive culture of absolutely obeying authority being seen as the greatest virtue.

That is probably the main cause of my discomfort while a student at BYU, as despite my very strict Mormon upbringing, I have always been very uncomfortable with any idea that limits free expression, free thought, free exchange of ideas, etc. There are far too many examples of this overarching, all-penetrating, and overwhelming (religious) authoritarianism to enumerate, but just three of them that have stuck out most in my mind are these:

1) Treating Students as Children

A then friend of mine was required to pay thousands a year for an on-campus meal-plan that wasn't redeemable at the on-campus grocery store because BYU had found that some freshmen lacked the skills to adequately feed themselves, and so decided to force all freshmen to eat at the cafeteria, including those that lived in the on-campus apartments that housed full kitchens. This despite the fact that she was 22, had attended several years of University in her home country of Germany, and wasn't a child. BYU thought it needed to play the role of parent to these students, instead of letting them learn to care for themselves and learn useful skills like self-sufficiency. Of course, the university's insistence in treating students as children means they often act as such. By taking away nearly any opportunity for a student to experience real independence, and by severely limiting what actions and experiences are available, they ensure the limited emotionally maturity of its graduates. While they learn in their respective majors useful life skills, they more importantly learn that obedience to authority is a virtue to be cultivated, and consequently are very poor independent thinkers.

2) The Honor Code

Every student, faculty member and employee is required to sign a sworn statement that they will follow the "Honor Code" which is an rather broad range of rules of external behaviour. Anything that is deemed a "sin" in Mormonism is also deemed to be against the Honor Code, but it certainly doesn't stop there. While it includes such "sins" as masturbation, pornography, and drinking, it also includes prohibitions against men growing facial hair or students of either gender wearing "immodest" clothing, not only on campus, or even during the semester, but even while at home during summer break/holidays! The rules against facial hair (excepting moustaches for some reason) and rules governing proper dress are probably the most disturbing.

Routinely in the student paper "The Daily Universe" students write opinion pieces about how disgusting and unattractive they find any sort of facial hair, and then often disparage the spiritual health and righteousness of any male individual who dares to grow facial hair, or who allows their hair to become "over-the-collar" or otherwise unkempt. They have been brainwashed to believe that facial hair is inherently unattractive because they believe it to be somehow "evil" - based on its forbidden status by the Honor Code, and because the Honor Code is virtuous and righteous and faultless. Also common is hearing the incredibly sexually repressed men (or even women) complain about the "immodest" dress of women who dare to show a little cleavage, or who walk around wearing a messenger bag whose strap goes between their breasts, separating and defining those dirty, naughty pillows of Satan!!! Because the students are so incredibly repressed sexually, not only do they often confess every instance of masturbation, but they get married more quickly, and have more children sooner than any other demographic I've ever witnessed.

All Mormons are required to attend church weekly, and non-Mormons their respective services as well. I've no idea what non-Mormon atheists/non-religious students are required to do - if indeed there are any. If students don't attend church, they can be punished with probation or expulsion.

If a student is caught viewing porn or engaged in an unapproved activity with another person (any activity besides kissing, or anything homosexual), the "Honor Code Office" often will require that student to attend therapy, and will, as a condition of their staying a student, require their therapist to breach confidentiality to the Honor Code Office, in order to check up on the student's "progress".

3) Academic Freedom

Students and faculty do not get to learn or teach in a true academically free environment. Along with the rules governing external behaviour and appearance, there are numerous banned books, topics, ideas, philosophies, political platforms, and even words (swearing).

For example, a person who express the (political) belief that gay (or in the preferred terminology "same-gender attracted") individuals ought to enjoy the full range of rights afforded to straight individuals is grounds for both ecclesiastical discipline and academic repercussions - expulsion if a student, firing if faculty. A faculty member can be prevented from teaching certain ideas or using certain books simply on the basis that a student may be offended and complain to the university. It is common for anything that causes a student to question their beliefs and biases to cause this. Of course, the main point of attending most universities is to have one's preconceptions challenged and learn new ways of thinking. This only applies at BYU if the thing being taught in no way intersects any church teaching or doctrine. Unfortunately, the church has doctrines and teachings about nearly everything, so it is almost impossible to have a truly open and unfiltered learning environment in any discipline.

A faculty member can be disciplined or fired for teaching, writing, or researching anything the university administration (under pressure from the church leadership in SLC) finds is incompatible with the doctrines of the church. Famously, professors have been fired for researching into church history and publishing unsavoury, but true aspects of the church's history; for espousing views, even scientifically supported ones, that "advocate" homosexuality or gay rights; and for being feminists.

The desire to control and proscribe every tiniest action a person is allowed to do is an attempt by the church (whether concious or not) to control the thoughts of its membership. Because they cannot directly monitor thought or internal belief, they measure everything on the externals. The social rules of Mormon society are so detailed that there is very little room for individuality. Indeed, it is better for the church if there is little-to-no individuality left in its members. The more a person adheres to the rules, the less likely they are to think for themselves.

The church sells a lifestyle where all of life's answers are available in a one-size-fits-all pre-packaged form. In order to fit into and be accepted by the community, you have to be just like everyone else. Even the most minor deviance - say drinking a cup of coffee - is punished. BYU takes this idea and runs with it as far as it can. Being a Democrat (let alone a liberal!), having sideburns that descend lower than the ear lobes, skipping Sunday School, buying groceries on Sunday, watching an "R-rated", or many PG-13 movies, arguing or questioning church doctrines while in in class during the week are all grounds for social ostracism.

Now it is true that there are pockets of more liberal and open people on campus, and a person can surround themselves with open-minded and reality-based people. However they must be very, very careful in what they say or do, even in private, lest they risk disciplinary action. No matter how well a person tries to insulate themselves from the authoritarian aspects of the university, they will be confronted with them daily, whether at church, whether from a authoritarian room-mate, classmate, or professor. There are campaigns that encourage students to tell on each other to the appropriate authority for any infraction against the social code. They sell this as necessary for keeping the righteous atmosphere of the Lord's University from being sullied by the wicked disobedient (liberals).

The Mormon idealisation and virtuisation of absolute obedience to authority is no where better experienced than at BYU - or perhaps even better at BYU-Idaho where even shorts and sandals are banned, where all students have a curfew, and where recently the student political clubs (Democrats and Republicans) were forcibly disbanded. I attended BYU for 8 semesters, and in that time I learnt that the most important virtue for Mormons isn't charity, or love, or compassion, or service, but obedience. Absolute obedience to authority is the key to being successful in Mormonism, and everything is secondary to obedience. Everything. A person may be convinced that supporting gay rights is logical, charitable, compassionate, nice, and even politically necessary, but they won't because they put obedience to authority as more important than any other consideration- even human rights. They do this because the authorities they obey receive their authority from God Himself, and despite reams of evidence to the contrary, will never lead the church or its members wrong.

My experience was Orwellian in many ways that almost defy explanation, and is probably hard for anyone who didn't experience it to understand. There are very few cultures in the US that are more authoritarian than Mormon universities, and even fewer that exhibit the extreme irony that is an authoritarian university.

On Racism and Revelations

You see some classes of the human family that are black, uncouth, uncomely, disagreeable and low in their habits, wild, and seemingly deprived of nearly all the blessings of the intelligence that is generally bestowed upon mankind. The first man that committed the odious crime of killing one of his brethren will be cursed the longest of any one of the children of Adam. Cain slew his brother. Cain might have been killed, and that would have put a termination to that line of human beings. This was not to be, and the Lord put a mark upon him, which is the flat nose and black skin. Trace mankind down to after the flood, and then another curse is pronounced upon the same race--that they should be the 'servant of servants;' and they will be, until that curse is removed.
~Brigham Young: President and second Prophet of the Mormon Church, 1844-1877

Many early Mormon Prophets and leaders taught that African Americans, or anyone with darker skin than whites, were born into condemnation due to their poor performance in the pre-existence. In this pre-existence, they “lent an influence to the devil” And displayed a “lack of integrity to righteousness. The origins of this racism lie in the very roots of the church as well as in its scriptures. The Book of Mormon tells us of the Lamanite race and how they received dark skins and a degenerative status as punishment for their sins. In the second book of Nephi the Lord tells us that those with dark skin will be a loathsome people, full of mischief and subtlety. It will only be through repentance that they will be able to overcome their evil ways and become as “white and delightsome” as the Nephites. The church teaches us that we will be punished for our own sins and not for Adams transgressions but interestingly enough black people are being punished for the sins of Cain first and foremost. It was because of these beliefs that black men were unable to hold the priesthood or enter the temple. Brigham Young, the second president of the church made it very clear that “No person having the least particle of Negro blood in them can hold the priesthood”. God’s punishment to anyone who dare intermarry was a separation from the presence of God, a spiritual death.

On June 8th, 1978 the first presidency of the church released a statement stating that through revelation it had been revealed to them that every worthy and faithful man in the church may receive the holy priesthood. A revelation, really? By 1978 the church had come under tremendous scrutiny not only by outside forces but by its own members as well. On January 11, 1963, the President of the Mormon Church surprised the world by announcing that the Church was going to send a mission to Nigeria. By this point the Mormon Church had mission all over the world except in the Negro nations of Africa. But the mission was unable to proceed due to the fact that the Nigerian government viewed the church as racist and refused to grant visas to any Mormon missionaries.

How about that pesky civil rights movement, how was the church going to overcome that one? The apostle Ezra Taft Benson had an answer for that , "The pending ‘civil rights' legislation is, I am convinced, about 10 per cent civil rights and 90 per cent a further extension of socialistic federal controls." Elder Benson said, "It is part of the pattern for the Communist take-over of America" (Deseret News, December 14, 1963). As the civil rights movement marched on though, the church was bombarded with demonstrations, boycotts, and threats. The church came under fire from the NAACP when a 12 year old boy scout was denied a leadership position because he was black. Shortly before Boy Scout officials were to appear before a federal judge on charges of discrimination, the church decided to issue a policy change. Next came the boycotts on the BYU sports teams. College teams from all across the US refused to play BYU until they lifted their racist policy of not letting blacks on any of their sports teams. BYU suffered through years of demonstrations as thousands marched upon the campus. In November of 1969 a minister in Denver, Colorado, called for a boycott of all Mormon goods and discouraged any travel to the state of Utah. In 1976 the church found itself repeatedly embarrassed by one of its own members, who upset over the priesthood ban, ordained a black man into the priesthood. Douglas Wallace was excommunicated for his actions and brought massive media attention to the church’s policies. As things heated up courageous members of the church started demonstrating outside church buildings and refusing to pay their tithing. The final bomb was dropped in the late 70’s when the IRS threatened to cancel the churches non-profit tax exempt status. As pressure mounted against the church and public outcry became to loud to ignore, first counselor Hugh B. Brown went on record as saying, “I doubt that we can maintain or sustain ourselves in the position that we have adopted which has no justification, I think that we are going to have to change out decision on that. I think that this is one of the most serious problems confronting us because it affects millions of colored people.”

The churches history is full of commandments handed down from God, to his modern day prophets, which have later been rescinded due to public outrage. They believe that God’s word is the same yesterday, today and forever, yet God seems almost as persuaded by public opinion as American Idol.